Indie Movies Online Com, November 25, 2010, Top five terrible movie accents by Paul Martin
Dick van Dyke in Mary Poppins (1964)
Awight, guv'nor, 'ow the bloody 'ell are ya? Yes, if there's one accent that the majority of folks seem to labour under the collective delusion that they are capable of brilliantly imitating then it is the stereotypical cockney twang of old Lahndan taaawn. This is despite the fact that the vast majority of experiments in this sphere come off sounding as cluelessly inaccurate as the voice employed by Dick Van Dyke in Mary Poppins.
Although in defence of the faltering efforts of every cockney imitator who isn't Van Dyke, they are most often simply trying to score a cheap laugh from their mates. They are not anchoring a Disney blockbuster in the pivotal role of a lovable chimney-sweep. Were they doing that then you would perhaps expect them to indulge in some exhaustive research. Listening to genuine Londoners speaking and analysing the nuances that shape those distinctive tones. Not roll out a theoretical East End patter which suggests cockneys are not real, live breathing human beings, but rather creatures of antediluvian myth, with uninformed speculation being the sole recourse as to recreating how they might possibly have sounded.